Large Family Curse?……No, Blessings
I belong to a very large family. Actually, more than one. If you take in account my very large Purdy family, (Mom’s side). Very large Staab family, (Dad’s side) and the LL’s family. He does not have a huge extended multi-generational family like I do, but he has 4 brothers, all with spouses and many kids, their spouses, and children.
Often lately, I have been thinking about how rough this last year was and how rough this year is turning out to be. reminiscent of the 12 months a decade ago that I lost my dad, my mother-in-law, our house fire, losing our home and all our possessions, then Max’s additional life altering diagnosis. That was a bad year.
Well last year, I had the blessing of two of my children’s weddings, but along with that, I lost 2 Aunts, 2 Uncles, my brother-in-law David, and my nephew Michael. Pretty crappy year. 😦
So far this year, my mom was very sick, my sister Kathy is very ill, and my brother-in-law Monte,…..well things are very rough. Kris picked me up this morning, I can’t get out of my driveway yet, so I slipped and slid walking down my driveway and met her down the road at a store parking lot. We went for a meeting to address many issues for my sister Kathy. Kris and I are her guardians. The meeting went well, as many of us are putting plans in place for the next few months. On the drive home, I had a mini-breakdown. Cried and voiced my anger of the unfair situations hitting my loved ones. Felt good, that cry. I try never to cry in front of Max….very upsetting to him. So I got it out of my system. But it got me thinking.
Statistics wise, it make sense that with the amount of family I have, there will be bad years. Not only does it hit my immediate family, but I have an uncle and cousin struggling too. Is it worth it? All this worrying and pain, is it worth it because I have a big family?????
It is. When we called hospice at the end of my dad’s life, my siblings and I never left his side for weeks. Always at least one, usually two holding vigil, making sure of his comfort. The pain of losing him was somehow more tolerable knowing you had five other siblings who were in just as much pain and were there to support you. When I went through my cancer. Many, many surgeries, chemo and radiation, lots of pain, I was rarely left alone. My husbands brothers and wives were my prayer warriors, my siblings and mom assisted my kids and LL, taking me to appointments and taking care of me on my sickest days. Small families don’t have that same support.
So I think the sorrow may come more often with a very large family, but the love just completely overwhelms all the pain. The burden is somehow lifted.
I hope that things turn around for my sis and Monte. I pray that they do, but I know no matter the outcome, there is a lot of love spread around me and again, we will all get through it. God bless